HGTV and Human Nature

I have been blessed to have been given a beautiful home -- large enough to raise our four children.  Three of them are now out and on their own -- building their lives pretty much apart from us. Which leaves Jeannine.

Now none of her brothers or sister would even think about not staying connected to her, and given the  fact that I have not yet embraced the challenge of helping her toward independent living away from me, she is still with us. So at a time when many of my friends find themselves "empty nesters" and have taken the challenge to downsize, sell their homes, move from the area, I just don't think this is for me.

Our house is closing in on 30 years old, and it is not unexpected that it has needed some revamping in the last few years. We were not the original owners, and in the course of our years here, we have painted, wallpapered and replaced carpeting to put our own personality print into the home. The major changes have been done mostly because there was a huge need, you know, things like a leaky roof or cracking counters in the kitchen. The best remodel, though, came in 2009 when Tim's cousin suggested that we repair our deck as a "DIY" project.

Jack has every tool that the Good Lord has allowed man to invent, so the two of them set out to dismantle and replace the worn wood deck with composite -- in the course of 3-4 days. Power tools like mitre saws, table saws, fancy power screwdrivers, a power washer, and construction lights for late night work --- there was no end to the tools Jack had to make rebuilding the deck easier. The whole project could be the subject of another story (and may likely), but just suffice it to say that after all was said and done, (four months later)... the finished product was gorgeous. It was hard to believe that we had lived in the house 10 years before updating that deck, with the result that the once unused (and in some places unsafe) structure was transformed into more than 1200 square feet of usable space. Then I thought: with the diminishing number of occupants in our home and my reluctance to downsize, what was the purpose in creating more space? Well.....

Where I would once have never considered inviting family or friends to gather for special occasions, I now became inspired to host any or all events. Infused with a sense of great excitement at the thought of our home being a place to entertain, but, on the other hand having no real skills to plan anything more than a child's birthday party, I began to research party planning. This is where I discovered the wonders of cable television.

Suddenly The Food Network, Man v Food, the Cooking Channel were my new companions. I found I was doing laundry, preparing meals, dusting, and doing dishes with the likes of Ina Garten and Bobby Flay cooking in the background. My confidence soared at the thought of bringing together family for birthday celebrations, our small circle of friends for game nights, and larger events for our church. The upshot is that as the last few years have passed, both Tim and I have come to enjoy being able to bring different groups of friends and family together for any number of reasons, or really none at all.

I have since "outgrown" the "cooking shows," and have now turned my focus on that other wonder of cable television, those programs that focus on homes, remodels and repurposing. What I have come to see as a common thread of these shows, whether it be "Property Brothers," "Love It Or List It," or "Fixer Upper," is that most people are looking for that "open concept" look and feel to their living environment. For a while I was getting so tired of hearing those two words together that I would reach for the remote to quickly change the channel. Then I began to reflect....a dangerous endeavor, I know...but there must be something about this "open concept" thing that appeals to the majority of people who are showcased on these programs.

My reflections took me back to my own feelings of bringing people together to do nothing more than share time, conversation and good times. Was this something that we all strive to have in our lives? "Yes," I thought to myself. For whatever else we are, at heart, social beings and it is important that we connect with others not only to "see and be seen," at the most basic level, but also, and what is more significant, to appreciate those around us and feel accepted, valued and validated in a world that constantly challenges the beliefs that are at the very fiber of our being.

So for what it is worth, I am going to move forward making those changes and updates to our home, knowing that, while it no longer serves the purpose of raising children, it can be repurposed to a place where people can get together, away from the hassles of our modern world, to connect with each other to find comfort, laughter, stupidity (sometimes) and a common ground not easily found in their day-to-day doings. Besides, that, Jeannine is "always down" for a party!